“Love bites, love bleeds, It’s bringin’ me to my knees.”
-Def Leppard, “Love Bites”

What a weird day; it’s that simple. Certain players went ahead and proved they’re insane again, one team lost in deflating fashion and their fortunate opponent sneaked into the second round, a powerhouse and a star are budding right before our eyes, and everyone is ignoring a Central American Cinderella. No one cares about that crap though; they just want to Google teeth marks on an Italian man’s flesh. Weird indeed.

June 24th, 2014

Uruguay 1 Italy 0: Yet another South American team advances, but the game wasn’t short on crazy, as expected. Balotelli jumped through someone for some reason, receiving a yellow card for his pointless actions, and once again Suarez bit another player. Sure, his teeth are quite large and pointy, but marks on Italian skin prove it was no accident. You know, it’s not that difficult to not bite someone, but this is this third instance, and FIFA may just ruin the country’s chances at a title by suspending the hungry Suarez. They played horrible against Costa Rica without their star player, and only got by the Italians, who were playing a man down a majority of the second half, on Godin’s late goal which went pathetically off his back on a poorly defended corner kick. They have a lot of work to do.

Italy bbc co uk
Photo courtesy of

Costa Rica 0 England 0: It’s official: Costa Rica won group D when no one thought they would win a game. Yes, a 0-0 game isn’t that entertaining, and yes, a 1-0 game is nearly as boring, but they showed signs of offense against Uruguay in their opener. Also, they have quietly played exceptional defense, only allowing one goal against three world soccer powers. They come from CONCACAF, a region rarely feared by Europeans and South Americans, but next week may prove differently. Unless I just jinxed them; man, would that suck; and unless they play the Ivory Coast, and Africa is just about as feared as CONCACAF.

CR thetimes co uk
Photo courtesy of

Greece 2 Ivory Coast 1: With all that being said, Costa Rica will face Greece. It’s unfortunate to see a team that has worked so hard, on the brink of advancing to the knockout round for the first time in its nation’s history, lose on a penalty kick in stoppage time. Not to mention that a defensive breakdown led to Greece’s first score late in the first half as well. It’s clear the team that was supposed to win did not, and once again an African nation is bowing out early. Greece struggled through this tournament and played like they would rather be home watching than competing. Now they have a shot against a Costa Rica side that’s advancing solely on momentum it seems. Something has to give, but Greece is getting used to being bailed out by other countries.

Photo courtesy of

Colombia 4 Japan 1: Neither Brazil, Argentina, Uruguay, Chile, nor Ecuador is the best South American team in this tournament. I may have forgotten someone, but who cares. It’s Colombia. They easily handled their group as a dominant team should, and their last game was very convincing. James (pronounced “Ha-mess” for some reason) Rodriguez is becoming a superstar as the world watches. He doesn’t just score, but he sets up his teammates which was evident on Martinez’s two 2nd half goals to break the game wide open. They play Uruguay in the next round which means that another South American team will be forced out of contention next week. Hooray for equality in soccer.

Brazil Soccer WCup Japan Colombia
Photo courtesy of

Today’s Slate:
Nigeria vs. Argentina: 12pm EST
Bosnia-Herzegovina vs. Iran: 12pm EST
Honduras vs. Switzerland: 4pm EST
Ecuador vs. France: 4pm EST


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